"you can’t be just friends with people of the gender you’re attracted to"
myth actually true. i, as a bisexual, can confirm that i have no friends.
pansexuals spend their lives in solitude, with only rocks for company
meanwhile asexuals are friends with everyone. literally every single person on the planet. i do not know how i remember so many names
I SWEAR TO GOD THERE IS A GIRL IN MY CLASS WHO CAN READ MY THOUGHTS SHE’S ALWAYS LOOKING AT ME FUNNY WHEN IM THINKING INAPPROPRIATE THINGS SO I SAID IN MY HEAD “START LAUGHING IF YOU CAN HEAR ME” AND SHE STARTED LAUGHING IM SCARED?????
This is either a plot for a new X-Men movie or a Stephen King novel.
Imagine that at the end of Dumbledore’s speech at the beginning of the year, he asks if there are any questions, and one first year muggleborn kid raises his hand, whips out a smart phone and asks for the wifi password.
And then Dumbledore just casually says “Sherbet lemon, with a capital S”, and commences the feast like it’s no big deal while the non-muggleborns think WIFI is some sort of secret society.
dad and mom
treat or trick
josh and drake
cheese and mac
stop that thank you
jelly and peanut butter
George and Fred
white and black
Juliet and Romeo
This is the most uncomfortable post on tumblr
The scariest thing about this post is that I couldn’t work out what was wrong for a good minute until I read them aloud because my brain automatically read them in their correct order
HEY TUMBLR, LET’S PLAY A GAME
To play this game, go to MapCrunch, select “hide location”, make sure you have all countries unselected, and click go. What this will do is drop you in a random part of the world. It’s as if you woke up on the side of a road in an unfamiliar country. The goal of the game is to find your way to an airport so you can return home.
Bonus Hard Mode: No using outside sources, and that includes using google maps to figure out your location from signs or landmarks
…I had plans today but now.
THE AIRPORT GAME IS BACK.
FUCK THIS GAME
LAST TIME I PLAYED IT DUMPED ME IN THE MOUNTAINS OF NORWAY
I PLAYED FOR LIKE 8 HOURS BEFORE BREAKING DOWN CRYING
OMG NO STOP THIS GAME IS MY LIFE!!!
WHY IS THIS BACK
I HAVEN’T USED THIS GIF SINCE FEBRUARY
IT DROPPED ME IN A FUCKING MUSEUM IN CANADA. TWICE. TWO SEPARATE CANADIAN MUSEUMS
WHAT THE FUCK IT’S MY THIRD MUSEUM
AND IT’S IN FUCKING ALBERTA I QUIT
I just…. there is so much wrong with this like THIS IS A SONG FOR PLUS SIZED POSITIVITY IN A WORLD WHERE THERE BASICALLY IS NONE and thin people STILL have to make it all about them and their feelings while girls are literally KILLING THEMSELVES out here to fit into a standard of beauty that should be considered arbitrary.
I just. I need to sit down a moment I am literally so mad.
DO YOU KNOW WHAT REALLY GRINDS MY BONES???
IN THE SONG SHE SINGS “FUCK THOSE SKINNY BITCHES- /NAH IM JUST PLAYING/ I KNOW YOU THINK YOUR FAT BUT EVERY INCH OF YOU IS PERFECT FROM THE BOTTOM TO THE TOP’
SHE LITERALLY SINGS THATS SHES KIDDING AND SHE THINKS YOUR PERFECT
SO YH FUCK THESE COMMENTERS BECAUSE YH THERE MAYBE SOME OTHER ISSUES WITH THE SONG BUT IM NOT DEALING WITH PEOPLE WHO DONT LOOK UP LYRICS
DEAR SKINNY GIRLS COMPLAINING: I’M SORRY THAT WHEN SOMEONE FINALLY WROTE A SONG THAT TELS ME I’M BEAUTIFUL, IT MADE YOU FEEL BAD (EVEN THOUGH IT’S BODY POSITIVE FOR ALL TYPES). IT FEELS FUCKING AWFUL, DOESN’T IT.
SO I GET HOME AND THERE’S THIS RANDOM KID ON MY COUCH AND HE’S LIKE ‘ALRIGHT MAN I DON’T WANNA HURT U JUST PUT UR STUFF DOWN AND GET ON THE GROUND I JUST WANT UR MONEY’ AND I FUCKIN ALMOST PUKED I WAS LIKE “OMG PLS NO I DON’T HAVE ANY MONEY I’M ONLY 15” THEN HE WAS LIKE “NAH MAN I’M JUST FUCKIN WITH U I’M UR BROTHER’S FRIEND HE’S IN THE SHOWER I’M JUST WAITIN FOR HIM”